by Devin Braden
I experienced triumphs and I loved all that the game of hockey offered, but I endured so many sports injuries. I broke six or seven bones, dislocated my rib from my spine and played with a torn hip flexor. I’d come off the ice and freeze my hip for 45 seconds and then play again. Two serious concussions weakened my speech and thought patterns. I randomly said words without meaning to. I stuttered and took a long time to think through simple tasks or problems. It felt as though my mind was empty most of the time. When I played lacrosse at the age of 12, I was so injured from hockey that I couldn’t bend down to tie my shoe. I’m now 25. That means that I’ve lived half my life in pain. I started playing hockey when I was four years old. I quit when I was 19. When I quit, my future, my new life, would include taking pharmaceutical pain medication for the rest of my life. Those take a toll on the organs. When I was 21, I couldn’t get up for five days. The doctor’s advice was to take more meds. But I was a zombie on meds. I couldn’t think straight.
One day I saw Bodhi’s Meditation & Health magazine at a store on Commercial Drive in Vancouver. It was labelled “Free” so I picked it and read it cover to cover. In January 2014 I went to my first Bodhi Meditation class at the Kitsilano Community Center on a Monday morning. During the meditation, with my eyes closed, I saw, just for a few minutes, a red light. I knew I was in the right place.
During an 8.5-day retreat, I had moments when the pain almost brought me to tears. And I have a high pain threshold. One of the volunteers told me to continue practicing and it will work itself out. He told me that “the easy way is the hard way, and the hard way is the easy way.” That happened every day until day 6 when the instructor asked me about my relationship with my father. I’d had no contact with my father for a year and a half, except for one letter. The instructor said, “Call your dad.” I called and we talked for 45 minutes.
I shed many tears at the retreat. The crying released blocked energy in my back, neck and chest. The sobbing released emotional pain and I could feel my heart-opening. After days of crying, I calmed down and felt like a kid, warmhearted, full of compassion. The sadness left me and I have felt overwhelming joy ever since. I am now free of pain and I no longer need pharmaceutical pain medication. As well, my brain function has improved and I am now thinking clearly and am confident in my speech. Today I feel amazing. I know that Bodhi found me.
Disclaimer:
- The effects associated with practicing Bodhi Meditation can vary from person to person.
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